Relax / Santai...

1. Cium Isteri


Pada suatu pagi, bertanya si isteri pada si suami:
Isteri : Abang tengok jiran kita yg baru pindah tu?
Suami : Kenapa?
Isteri : Tiap pagi sebelum pergi kerja, suami dia akan cium isterinya. Bila pulang
kerja, dia akan berikan isterinya sekuntum bunga mawar… Loving betullah
mereka. Kenapa abang tak buat macam tu?

Suami : Nak mampus!… Mana abang kenal isteri dia?!

2. Bunuh Setan



Suatu petang selepas pulang dari kuliah agama di surau si isteri menceritakan apa yang didengarnya dalam kuliah tersebut kepada suaminya.


“Abang, abang nak tau tak, ustaz kata bila suami dan isteri itu bersatu/bersetubuh kan bang, dengan cara yang betul dan menjaga syarat yang betul maka pasangan tersebut akan mendapat pahala sama seperti membunuh 10 ekor atau beberapa ekor syaitan”

Kata si suami “yerr kerr?, tak apa malam ni malam Jumaat, masa yang sesuai untuk bunuh syaitan kan , betul tak sayanggg?” sambil ketawa. Isteri hanya tersenyum panjang.

Selang dua hari kemudian, si isteri berkata “banggg, jom kita bunuh syaitan bang”. Si suami tersenyum panjang.


Selang dua hari kemudian, si isteri berkata, “banggg, jom kita bunuh syaitan bang”. Suami berkata “‘takpe…tunggulah malam”.


Esoknya si isteri berkata, “banggg, jom kita bunuh syaitan…bang”. Si suami diam sambil mengangguk lemah.


Esoknya si isteri berkata lagi, “banggg, jom kita bunuh syaitan… “, suami tiba – tiba marah dan berkata ……..“Ayang nie nak bunuh syaitan ke atau nak bunuh abang?!”

3. Belajar bahasa English



Seorang gadis yang Bahasa Ingerisnya kacau-bilau… suatu hari terlanggar seorang pelancong US ketika berjalan2 di The mall.

Gadis : I’m sorry.

Pelancong : I’m sorry, too


Si gadis kelihatan bingung kerana tidak faham apa yang diperkatakan oleh pelancong itu.. dia meneka2 dan terus menjawab…


Gadis : I’m sorry, three


Pelancong : What are you sorry for??


Gadis : I’m sorry, five!

4. Kek Hari jadi



Seorang lelaki telah pergi ke sebuah kedai kek untuk memesan sebiji kek sempena hari jadi isterinya. “Apa yang hendak ditulis pada kek ulang tahun ini, encik?”, tanya si gadis manis yang bertugas di kaunter kepada lelaki itu.


“Mmmm, tulis saja…”Sayang tidak bertambah tua” di bahagian atas, kemudian sambung dengan “Sayang cuma bertambah cantik” di bahagian bawah”, kata lelaki itu.


Esoknya, lelaki itu datang mengambil kek yang ditempahnya itu dan terus membawa pulang ke rumah untuk dipersembahkan kepada isterinya yang tersayang di hadapan tetamu-tetamu yang lain. Dan ketika kek itu dibuka di depan isteri dan tetamu undangan yang lain, lelaki itu setengah pengsan ketika membaca tulisan yang tertera di kek itu….


"SAYANG TIDAK BERTAMBAH TUA DI BAHAGIAN ATAS. SAYANG CUMA BERTAMBAH CANTIK DI BAHAGIAN BAWAH”

Hohoho!! Enjoy!~!!

Why we shouldn't fear Pastor Terry Jones and his intimidations!!

Note: This article was written before 9/11/2010.

Say: "If both humanity and jinn banded together to produce the like of this Qur'an, they could never produce anything like it, even if they backed each other up." [The Quran, 17: 88]


A few days ago, I was watching the news when I saw a report about Pastor Terry Jones who is planning to burn the Qur'an on 9/11. At first, I got really sad and upset and I wanted to cry at the thought that the beautiful words of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala were going to be burnt. I wonder if Terry Jones ever read the Qur'an, and if he did, wasn't he at least touched by its beauty? The more I watched the report, the more disturbing it became. I found myself helpless in front of such a blatant insult and offense towards the Qur'an and the Muslims. But then, I got an epiphany.

This man could not burn the Qur'an. He can burn pieces of paper on which the


Qur'an is printed, but he certainly can not burn the Qur'an. Because the Quran is preserved in al-lawh al-mahfuz (The Preserved Tablet):


21. Nay; but this is a glorious Qur'an,


22. Inscribed on a well-guarded Tablet. [From Surah 85 of the Quran]


We have sent down the Reminder, and We will preserve it. [The Quran, 15: 9]


This is the promise from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. Even if the whole world came together to corrupt it or destroy it, they wouldn't be able to. Let's rejoice brothers and sisters, man can not destroy the Qur'an. If we trust in Allah, which we should as Muslims, then there is nothing to worry about.


The Qur'an further states that:


It is nothing less than a message to all nations. [68:52]


Therefore, regardless of our attachment to this book, it doesn't belong to us. It was revealed to all of humanity, this pastor is burning his own book.


Let us then remember that the believers are those who believe in the Unseen and the will of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. If Allah allows this to happen, then alhamdulilah, because the words of Allah can not be extinguished by man.


And finally, the Qur’an says:


Therefore excuse them and proclaim, "Peace"; for they will soon come to know. [43:89]

Allahuakbar!!!
Long live Islam...!!!